In celebration of our extremely successful launch in Ireland we thought we’d have a bit of a limerick competition. You know the sort of thing; ‘There was a young man from Devizes…’ (cleanish please, or not, but then we won’t be able to print it, just titter here at GKHQ). It doesn’t have to be about a GoKart, but the theme should be golf.
We’ll run the competition for a month, and the winner will have their limerick illustrated by Geoff Waterhouse and sent to them in a posh frame, completely unique and ready to display with pride.
So to start the ball rolling, a quick one from Mr. W himself –
Simply enter your creation, along with your name in the comment box below.
A fair weather golfer, that’s me
I’m out with the sun on the tee
I won’t take the strain
If it’s pissing with rain
‘Cos I’m back in the bar, tee hee
An elderly golfer called Giles
Altered his Kart with some files
He said “tho’ it’s neat
I’ve adapted the seat
To receive my very large piles
With carbon shaft and titanium head
And golfing shoes with the latest tread
i’ve got the gear
All made this year
But still I play like the walking dead
one of my friends owns a billy
the other one carries he`s named willy
the others uses his caddy
but i`ve got the daddy
they can`t beat my kart i`m not silly
The guys up ahead were so slow
Those behind just wanted to go
So they adjusted their Go-Karts
Passed all the old farts
And ended up winning the show
August 15th is my 71st birthday
So it is easy for me just to say
That right from the start
My lovely Go-Kart
Has been a God send.
There was a young golfer called Art
Who took great pride in his GoKart
It would be extreme folly
To mess with his trolly
More than likley he’d take you apart
An ancient old golfer from Devon
asked could he play golf in Heaven
Oh yes said his vicar
and,thanks to your ticker
they’ve got you teeing off at half seven.
There was a young golfer from Leek
who lost his last ball in a creek
Oh, damn, blast and bother
I’ve not got another
that’s me done with golf for this week.
There was a young golfer from Herts
Who ignored the ease of Go Karts
Now his back is in pain
He can’t play golf again
But he is getting better at darts
There was a young golfer called Ted
To the GoKart shop he sped
He was served in a flash
For so little cash
What value for money he said
A sausy old girl called Eliza
Asked GoKart to please devise her
A cart with strong wills
To cope with the hills
And then pore a pint to revive her
There once was a poor golfing duffer
Whose scores just got rougher and rougher.
He bought a GoKart,
Took the course quite apart,
But his handicap surely did suffer!
A young lady golfer from Luss
Bought a GoKart to take on the bus.
She said to the driver
“I’m yours for a fiver”.
My God – what a hell of a fuss!
A lady GoKarter from Kent
Charged her battery up with intent
To make it go faster –
But what a disaster –
Instead of just coming – she went!
There was an old man from Leek
Who liked to play 4 times a week
Had a fright with his heart
So he bought a Go Kart
And now all you see is a streak
The Go Kart arrived as a gift
The man’s golf really needed a lift
So he loaded his gear,
And shot par or near
Then his partners were all really miffed
to swing every club without swaying
smart golfers on links are all saying
to make a good start
get yourself a GoKart
then doing eighteen is plain saling
There was young golfer from Slough
Whose ball bounc-ed back off a bough;
The fast flying lob
Hit his mate in the gob
And all he could utter was ‘wow’.
While driving the 10th in a breeze,
Sid sliced his ball into the trees,
His second had height
And went out of sight
To land on the green with some ease.
Not knowing the line of his shot,
He ended up searching a lot,
Not finding his ball,
Was ready to bawl,
‘Til his partner said ‘ it’s in the pot’!
a talented golfer off two
always carried his clubs to look cool
until he got beat
one day in the heat
by a scratch guy with a go kart
the fool.
I wanted to go to the shop
With a bad knee I’d have to hop
So with my GoKart primed
On a skateboard I climed
Only to be chased by a speedcop
My caravan I needed to tow,
but my car battery was low,
So with my GoKart adapted
On video I’ve captured
our exploits to prove and show.
Bean’s driver is bound to be fun
The head is combined with a gun
He tee’d off on the 3rd
And took out a bird
On his way to a par five in one!
His GoKart was like his best mate
For practice at home it was great
He set up a ramp
To get over the lamp
And that was just to carry his plate
There was a young woman from Hayston
Who couldnt play golf, and then some..
She bought a gokart
Which gave her a start
And now she is keen on a threesome (I mean three ball)
What do you mean is doesnt rhyme?
There was a young lad from Dundee
Who could not chip or putt for toffeee
a gokart was sent for
which acted as mentor
and now he plays first off the tee
There was a tall hacker from Poole
Who struggled in bunkers, poor fool
A gokart in green
was soon on the scene
now he birdies each hole as a rule
A Gokart with go-faster stripes,
Wide wheels and huge exhaust pipes,
If you need custom fit,
For your golfing kit,
GoKarts adapt to all types!